A national level seminar for journalists and writers were organized at Pune in March 20156. The subject of the seminar was “Journalists and Family Values”. Speaking in the seminar Psychologist Angeli said, “I used to hate my father; for he was a drunkard. But I adored my mother.” Then the young speaker spoke about hell-like situation of her house. Father after his job went for his drinking party with his friends and come home fully drunk late in the night. Then daily he created turmoil in the house shouting at the top of his voice as well as beating mother and me. He used abusive language for friends and neighbors.
But my mother is very loving and by nature very quiet. She served silently her drunken husband with much love and patience. She showed much love on her husband. She deals with everyone with much peace and forgiveness. She never quarreled or complained! Daily she went to church and participated in the mass. She also took me with her and we came back home before my father got up daily. Then she dealt with my father as if nothing has happened on previous night. She gave him washed and ironed dress, fed us with hot breakfast. By the time father and I finished breakfast, the tiffin for father was ready. For father everything is ready on time.
My father who was a drunkard for many years once took part in Alcoholic Anonymous programme and he was free from his habit of drinking. And then our house because like an Oasis in the desert. Our house became a heavenly shrine with much love, peace, forgiveness and understanding for all the time.
After hearing the psychologist speaking her terrible experiences of her teenage years, I decided that I will share her experience with my readers. For, in Gujarat in spite of the prohibition law the problem of drunkenness is wide spread. Many families are destroyed because of the drinking habit of the bread-winner. But as I see the mother of Angeli, the psychologist, is a loving character worth emulation. She is a person who not only upholds the family values but she also follow them very faithfully as a respectful wife, an ideal house-wife and as a women of fortitude. In the words of the Bible, she is a model women “who will not shout or raise his voice or make loud speeches in the streets. S/he will not break off a bend reed or put out a flickering lamp. S/he will bring lasting justice to all.” (see Isaiah 42: 2-3).
A mother’s job is the noblest work a human being is capable of. If one has to pay for the job of a mother, then she should be paid more then CEO of an International company. Mother’s job entitled 24 hours’ service. Mother has to keep awake when there is a little child at home or someone is sick at home. A mother’s job calls for much skillfulness, much expertise and much alertness.
Motherhood is the crown of creation. But it is said that man is ot proud of a mother’s job! She is not respected for her unique job. Often it is the case that the mothers themselves do not value and take pride in their job. They do not rejoice in their unique job. A women as a mother and still her husband may say that her wife does not do anything! Her son may say, mother is at home, does not do anything.
Here I would like to speak of a mother who is working in a Charitable Trust office. As she is working in my own office I know her story well as a working mother. Only a mother can do the miracle of conceive a child in womb, cherish and nourish it for nine months in her own body. She has to take care that the child grows well in her womb through the food she takes, the exercise she does, and love the child all the time. Then, in the fullness time she gives birth to her darling child. After taking the paid delivery leave and then extending the leave further with half pay she joined duty. But she felt that with her full time service she cannot do justice to her responsibility as a mother and housewife. So she talked to me about her intention to resign from permanent job.
She has been very efficient in her works in my office. So I told, looking the works in my office which requires an efficient person like you, I would not like to accept your resignation. But I see your need to take care of your child whom you are still breast-feeding. \Then you have also your bigger child to prepare and send him to school on time. You also have to see that your husband goes to office ready with his tiffin etc. so considering all your responsibilities as a mother, wife and house-maker, I have no option but to accept your resignation. I take this decision because I appreciate a mother’s job more than the need of my office. This may be exception but I do know that there are few in the whole world who value and appreciate a mother’s job.
There is a small booklet in Gujarati entitled “Jenet” meaning mother edited by Mita Bhargav. She has collected many quotations from eminent people’s appreciation for motherhood. Here I give just two quotations.
“All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother” Abraham Lincoln.
“If the whole world were put into one scale, and my mother in the other, the whole world will would kick the beam.” Lord Londale.
Finally I dedicate this article to all women deprived of the appreciation and respect for their job as mother.
Changed On: 16-01-2018
Next Change: 01-02-2018
Copyright Fr. Varghese Paul, SJ – 2017